Struggles

VALPARAISO | The Valparaiso University campus was in mourning Thursday following the death of Darlene Grega, the university's first female pastor.

Grega, with the university since August of 2008, apparently died in her home Wednesday night. In a statement to the media Thursday, VU President Mark Heckler said Grega was "someone who cared so deeply for the members of this community."

"She will be remembered for the many relationships she built, the lives she touched and the myriad gifts she shared with our community," Heckler said. "In particular, she provided significant counsel and support to women on our campus and built relationships with our international students to help them feel welcomed here. Pastor Grega provided leadership for the university's residential ministry and the Fellowship House. She counseled many others."

Students and faculty were invited to a night prayer service Thursday night at the lower Gloria Christi Chapel of the Chapel of the Resurrection and to a morning prayer service today at 11:15 a.m. In a message sent to faculty and students Thursday, Heckler said chapel and counseling services staff would be available at both services to offer support with the grieving process.

The university will hold nightly prayer services through April 16 at 10 p.m. Tonight's service will be a silent prayer vigil organized by the Residential Ministries, Valparaiso International Student Association and Alliance.

"The silent, interfaith prayer vigil, with lighting of candles and incense sticks, commemorates how Pastor Grega often brought comfort to us and activated our conscience amidst human tragedies, such as the bombing in Mumbai, India, and the Haitian earthquake," said Mark Schwehn, provost and executive vice president for academic affairs.

The Sunday candlelight service will be held in the main chapel. Grega is survived by a son.

"We must now care for one another and those loved ones she leaves behind," Heckler's message to the university community stated. "May God bring comfort and peace to all who mourn and may God's boundless grace and the promise of Easter extend to our beloved sister."

Grega was affiliated with the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America branch of the Lutheran faith.




This is just one of the many articles written this week about the passing of an amazing woman, Rev. Darlene Grega. She was many things, including my Godparent.

My parents each found out about her passing within minutes of each other and called to pass along the news. We were all in shock at the loss and after a short discussion we quietly said our good nights. At that point we did not know what had happened so I spent most of the evening thinking of all the possibilities. Then I thought of her son, I thought of my own parents and of my own mortality, I thought about all the college students at Valparaiso who were mourning and thought about how the world had lost such a strong and influential woman.

The next day I was notified that it had been determined a suicide.

My heart aches. What level of pain must she had been feeling to believe that this was her only way out? How desperate must she have been? Even with all her education in counseling, even with all her available resources and all her colleagues she still chose this. I kept saying, "I just don't understand." And to be honest, I still don't and probably won't ever.

I'm just at a complete and utter loss and have this pit in my stomach each time I think of her and what she must have been going through.

I pray she has finally found solace. I pray that her son finds comfort in knowing so many people are sharing in his pain. I pray that her death brings about change on the campus of Valparaiso. I pray that people continue to do the good which she has done. And I pray for those who are contemplating the same measure.

Today the sun was a bit brighter and the breeze a bit cooler than yesterday. Each day is a gift and Darlene's life is a good reminder of that.

"This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it."